Red, White and Me

From Denmark to Canada.....Reality is finally setting in that I am leaving.

I spent today with my two most favourite people in Copenhagen: Lise and Pete. Lise and I had a random coffee catch up chat where we shared, and laughed, and shopped, sat on random shop stairs, and really just did what we always doL: TALK 24/7.

Then we both headed to Petes house for a Chicken curry and rice dinner, however Lise was unexpectedly called away.

So then it was just Pete and I hanging out, as has happened so often throughout the year. In a complete comfort zone that only exists with a very close friend, I watched some TV, he emailed his girlfriend Lone, in India, and we randomly chatted while cooking dinner.

We always intended on getting a movie, but when I was watching some of Pretty Woman showing on TV, Pete started to play his computer game. Being a competitive person, I wanted to give it a go... and starting at about 21.30 we played the war computer game FAR CRY untill 1.30am. We were obsessed with moving up the levels, and the game was really freaking me out at times with how life like it felt. I can't believe so much time passed though, it was crazy.

But it was the best night, just hanging and chilling with a close friend.

I realised going home that for both Pete and Lise, this would be one of the last times for awhile I would hang out with them, and it was quite a saddening thought. I think in all the lead up to leaving I never quite thought about the close friends that I would be leaving behind. Yes, of course I will most likely see them again, there is no doubt about that, and we will keep in contact as we need too naturally... but basic life hanging out with each other will not be a possibility.

I think up untill today I have been fuelled by an excitement of what the new place brings (so typical me), but not really fathoming what the old place holds... the memories, the people, the friendships, the saddness of leaving certain things.

So I guess at the moment I have a very weird emotion happening. It is unlike leaving Sydney last year, because I know that I will live there again, and I know the relationships I formed over 4 or so years and more with people are solid. I know I have some of those close friends here aswell, but the difference is, I know I will not be living here again in the near future... well not as I can forsee anyway... so that makes it a very weird situation, and a new one for me to be in.

I recieved an sms and an email today from some friends in Copenhagen, saying tomorrow will be a day of tears for them. That they will be sad that I am leaving. And now, I have to confess, I think there will be tears from me. Tears I have not allowed myself to fully cry for the place that over the last year has been my life and my home.