Deep Intensity

Sometimes I get into these moods - moods where for no reason at all I feel sad.

Disconnected. Introspective. Imbalance.

They do not come very often, but when they do - they hit in a hard way.

When I am in such a state, I really hear the noise of the world.

The chatter of people, I notice the need to connect, the roles people play, the lines that we use to reach each other... and I almost physically step back from it all.

For in these times, all this serves as clutter for me.

I feel myself needing to be away from people.

To rebalance and connect to myself. To look within - and contemplate life's meaning.

But above all, I find within me the intense need to write, and write, and write, and write, and write...

And so tonight, I left a social event early and suddenly to return home and write a torrent of words in my book I am pulling together.... and like a dove in the sky, I feel myself surfing on the wave of emotion that is inside me at the moment - and trying desperately to understand it's roots.